Today I woke up early, eyes open bright and jumped out of bed. July 11th is like a birthday to me. It’s the day I got clean and sober. This year marks four years. My clean date being 7/11/11. While my actual birthday was last Saturday, this day trumps all others, it’s the day in which I got my life back, now being four years ago. Today is the day I celebrate. Born again into a better life.
I’ve had a smile on my face all day. I spent a wonderful early afternoon with one of my dearest sober friends laughing and drinking coffee. Talking about how time flies and how great it will be and how surreal it will feel once I have 10 years under my belt. For them it was one of those, “no way,” moments. The kind you can’t stop grinning about. Later I dressed up, got my hair done, got take out which I never do, I usually always cook at home unless going out occasionally with my few good friends and later I’ll order a movie and sit back and relax. I ordered myself a new pair of running shoes. It seemed apropos, since when I first cleaned up that’s what I would do, go for runs. For the police academy I’ll need to get that 8 minute mile in so I need to start my running game back up. No more jogging but hardcore training. The past four years have been a blessing. Not to say that there haven’t been difficult times, ones where I wanted to tear my hair out or cry my eyes out, but feeling that emotion, living through it surpasses covering it up with drugs and alcohol by far. My good friend Acey told me a few years back, “living sober ‘aint easy, but it’s way better, no matter what.” I’ve passed this on to my clients who I do recovery mentoring work with and it’s the truth. The most baffling thing that has happened over and over through the hard times is that after they’ve passed, I realized I never once thought about picking up a drink or a drug. Now that in and of itself is amazing. How my programming changed and how I am now on autopilot with positive coping mechanisms. Cry it out, work through it, call a friend or my parents and to see the light beyond the dark. I am thankful, grateful and humbled by my endless support of friends and their congratulations messages and calls today. Those mean the most. I’m thankful for my parents and friends not giving up on me and the new wonderful ones I’ve made in the sober community. My life has only gotten better by quitting the shit, drugs and alcohol. In the past four years doors have opened, opportunities arisen that never would have, had I not cleaned up. I wouldn’t be a published author, have this site, be a journalist for Inkspired Magazine, writing their Positive Spin column, met the people I have, gotten the modeling jobs I did in NYC or the opportunity to work with talented sober artists on their projects, like Chris Motionless from the band Motionless in White on their music video, “America.” Being sober has allowed me to help others through being a recovery mentor and also pursuing my dream further into service work as a police officer. That is my goal and without my sobriety I would not be able to ascertain it. Strength, will and determination to live a better life got me to where I am today. Happy, healthy, clean, sober and living a good and simple life. I thank the heavens everyday, no joke for blessing me with this new life, now four years strong, and I don’t think I’ll ever stop thanking them. Here’s to four years clean and sober and the many more to come until I draw my last breath. Blessed Be. For further reading: Hi, Have You Met Me? on Amazon/Kindle http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00B009W1M There's No Good Campfires Left In Hell on Amazon/Kindle http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00H7CZ590 |
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January 2021
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